Fall Reading List

I don't know about you, but I'm a mom to a 9 month old baby boy and he requires my attention pretty much 24/7. Which I love, but I also love my quiet times and getting to read a good book at the end of the day. Especially one that will capture my full attention and force me to grip the edges and not want to put it down.

These two books do exactly that for me. What Women Fear by Angie Smith and You and Me Forever by Francis Chan & Lisa Chan.

I know what you might be thinking, "Christian books... really?" 

However, What Women Fear is very versatile. That's what I love most about Angie Smith's books, she appeals more to the younger generation of women. Not that every woman couldn't read her books but just by the way you hear her voice through her writing, and for me personally, it's so easy to relate to her and certain situations she writes about. What Women Fear is an amazing guide to show you that as a woman even though we fear much in this world, you have God and other women to talk to. So many of us are scared to tell our girlfriends what goes on behind closed doors or even just in our minds for fear of judgement, but let me explain to you that if you have a Christian friend they should be willing and able to listen and even hug you around the neck and cry with you. We should be shining Godliness around our friends instead of judgement. There are so many more aspects of this book that will take you deeper into every part of your life and you will fall in love with it. I keep reading it over and over again. This is actually my sisters copy so let's hope she doesn't see this! ;)

You and Me Forever is a little different, it's actually a book on Christian marriages. But I have to say the beginning of the book speaks more about individual relationships with God. Basically, if you as a person are not where you need to be with God then you're obviously going to lack in "Godly marriage" part of your life. Working on yourself first is always a must. This book is pretty amazing though, it really brought to life what marriage should should be and what it's really about. It gave me a whole new perspective to live by. You will definitely be blown away by what you're reading.

A lot of people ask why Christians are so concerned about reading books on God rather than focusing on reading straight out of the Bible. I have to say reading books doesn't change a thing for me, I love studying my Bible and I am constantly moved by the scriptures that I read. I can read one and then the next day read the same one, and it could strike me in two completely different ways, and sometimes even more powerful than before. The objective for reading Christian books is that you're learning from people in our world today, and the problems that the world puts in front of us on a daily basis. I feel like it's important to hear other peoples stories, and their experiences and testimonies, so that we know we're not alone with our feelings. That someone has gone through the same thing and has come out of it a stronger person and closer to God.

Trust me, you won't regret purchasing these books! I hope you enjoy them as much as I do! :)

Beautifully Tethered

 For this Mommy Monday I would like to switch it up and dedicate it to all the amazing Daddys out there!

I have been eager to devote some time writing about my husband, Matthew. Of course, this blog was created by me and I do all the writing, but for my readers to understand the dynamic of our family, I would like for everyone to know a little more about my wonderful husband. This has been a whirlwind of experiences for us, getting married, then getting pregnant a few weeks later and having to become first time parents so quickly. Don't get me wrong, we have loved every second of it, but it is nice to finally slow down the pace of taking huge steps and enjoy our family. 

My husband has been so amazing through every obstacle. Not that getting married and having a baby are necessarily obstacles, but all the little twists that were in between.

The one thing I love most about Matthew is his determination. When he sets his mind on going for something he won't stop until it's finished or he's where he needs to be. I jumped the gun a little when I knew Matt was the man I was supposed to grow old with. He already had my ring and was on the road to a proposal but I wanted him to hurry up and do it. Don't ask me why, I guess I just needed that final confirmation that he also knew I was the one. That's the one time my determination got me. After we got engaged and were planning the wedding Matthew's persistence kicked in because we hit some bumps in the road. I had asked him if we should wait and take a longer engagement and he refused. All in all, I guess you could say we have always fought for each other, as in we are always determined to end up side by side. We've had our ups and downs but together we make an awesome team. I love when he finds ways to make me laugh when I'm upset, he's good at that. I love him so much. I could go on and on but I don't want you to put your finger in your mouth and make that puke face. 

However, from my perspective in our marriage, Matthews biggest weakness is babies. I'm just going to put it out there, he is not good with babies, especially newborns. I've read some other stories about moms having this same problem with their husbands, it just doesn't come as naturally for them as it does for us. At first I was angry, I thought it was a show or excuse to get out of helping. But Matthew was so scared to death of doing something wrong that it made him physically sick to his stomach. 

I will say I was disappointed at first, but on the other hand I was partially blinded because I was so ready to be a mom that I couldn't understand Matthews situation. The saying I heard the most while I was pregnant was, "No matter how hard you try, you'll never be fully prepared for a baby." This was obviously something I should've considered for Matthew's sake. We all make the mistake of automatically assuming this means financially. No. It doesn't.

But as Levi grows, Matt gets more and more attached and comfortable. I love watching them together, especially when Matthew gets home from work. Both him and Levi light up like fireworks when they see each other. It's breathtaking. Through all of this, I have learned to embrace our weaknesses. Matthews not good with babies, but you have to always remember it soon will pass. Matthew is a wonderful Daddy and I know as Levi gets older, they will become more and more inseparable. And I'm not perfect either. My biggest flaw since I've become a mom is always saying, "Just let me do it." I hardly ever let anyone else take the reins, and I know I need to work on that.

I made the decision long ago that I refuse to be the wife or mom full of resentment, I don't want to live like that. I want to love my family all the days of my life. My job is to stay home with Levi and nurture our family, Matthew's job is to provide and be the strong hand. I embrace mine and Matt's life together, both our strengths and weaknesses. It's what makes us beautifully tethered as one.

"A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives." (1 Corinthians 7:39 NLT)

Friday Favorites

 

 I have to just put it out there that I'm a lover of food! Since my son was born and I decided to exclusively breastfeed, I don't worry about watching what I eat for the time being.

So I decided to do a little Friday food post to get the weekend started!

This specific dish has always been a hit for me at family events! It's called Deviled Egg Pasta Salad. If you're a big fan of deviled eggs like I am and you love pasta then trust me, this will be heaven in your mouth.

And the great thing is it's super easy to whip up and a great side dish for the holidays!

Ingredients:  

6 eggs

1 lb Elbow noodles large

3 cups of Miracle Whip or Mayonnaise

2 tbsp yellow mustard

1 tsp white vinegar

salt and pepper to taste

1/4-1/2 cup dill pickle relish

Paprika

Boil your eggs then peel and chop. Cook pasta according to directions on package. While pasta is cooking, whisk together the miracle whip, mustard, vinegar, and salt and pepper. Then gently fold pasta, eggs, and relish into the sauce. You can taste for seasoning and re-season if you'd like. Sprinkle with paprika. Cover and refrigerate until serving. Personally, I feel like it's way better the next day, having given the flavors time to marry. 

I hope you love this dish as much as our family has! Enjoy!

A Pillar of Salt

 Jesus said the greatest commandment was to love God with all your heart and love each other.

God's goal for this blog is not to make anyone feel uninvited or unwelcome. Just know that when I write, I'm coming from a Christian perspective, because these are my beliefs. I believe God's word. 

Jesus ate with sinners and welcomed them. Luke chapter 5 says, "But the Pharisees and their teachers of religious law complained bitterly to Jesus’ disciples, “Why do you eat and drink with such scum?” Jesus answered them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners and need to repent.” (Verses 30-32 NLT)

This brings me to our topic, in Genesis chapter 19 we read about a man named Lot who comes to meet two angels of The Lord, and invites them to stay with him in his home in the town of Sodom. Meanwhile all the men of Sodom gathered around Lot's home and wanted the angels to come out so they could have sexual relations with them. The angels were called there by God to destroy the city because all the people were corrupted by these sins. The angels told Lot and his family to leave the town and Sodom and Gomorrah were left behind to be engulfed in burning sulfur from the sky.

This topic has really been on my heart because it has struck a nerve with Christians that recently in our news in Houston, TX attorneys sent out subpoenas for five pastors sermons. I feel it's not a coincidence that the Houston mayor is openly gay because they're specifically looking for contents including homosexuality. Although it is written plain and simple in Leviticus 18:22 and Christians should obey His word, we are still called to love everyone, but we feel a storm is brewing. The story from the Bible about Lot frightens me to the core, because that is what our nation has become. And not because of the non believers, Christians as well, we are all sinners, it's our nature. The subpoenas being distributed confirms for us that Christians are becoming a huge target. We were already a target when the Isis group started killing Christians. We have always been a target and we always will be. But to a point now in our generation and in our nation that was built on freedom, our pastors are being threatened about preaching God's word and to obey God by not participating in homosexuality, this is a HUGE deal. It doesn't really matter if there was a misunderstanding or the subpoenas were worded the wrong way, it's inexcusable. We have to stand strong and continue to love, no matter who or what comes after us. We cannot let it break our love and trust for our God or our love for all people. When we are vulnerable, doubt and fear sets in, and satan sees that we're weak and he will prey on us. Stand firm in Christ, He is in control, and He will protect His children.

This doesn't mean we shouldn't have a voice. This isn't the time to keep quiet. Stand up for Christ. We should inform others that attacking our pastors is not acceptable. -

“Let me go on, and I will show you the truth. For I have not finished defending God! I will present profound arguments for the righteousness of my Creator. I am telling you nothing but the truth, for I am a man of great knowledge. “God is mighty, but he does not despise anyone! He is mighty in both power and understanding. He does not let the wicked live but gives justice to the afflicted." (Job 36:2-6 NLT)

Sen. Rand Paul said the First Amendment "doesn't exist to keep religion out of government. It exists to keep government out of religion."

If you haven't already I'm encouraging you to pray for our nation, our government, and our leaders.

"That is why God abandoned them to their shameful desires. Even the women turned against the natural way to have sex and instead indulged in sex with each other. And the men, instead of having normal sexual relations with women, burned with lust for each other. Men did shameful things with other men, and as a result of this sin, they suffered within themselves the penalty they deserved." (Romans 1:26-27 NLT)

Mommy Monday has arrived!

Yay! It's our first Mommy Monday here at My Little Valentimes! I'm so excited for you to see what I have in store tonight. So let's get to it!

First off, I want to talk about giving your baby solid foods. I know that doesn't sound interesting but trust me, I'm going to make it juicy! If you're exclusively breastfeeding like me, your baby should hold off on solids until 6 months. I know some formula fed babies might start a little earlier than that and that's okay, it's whatever works for you and your baby. However, not too many years ago we didn't have all the restrictions we do now for giving our babies proper nutrition. So I thought it would be fun to have a little blast from the past. I interviewed two of my family members, that had children quite a few years before me, to hear what they used to let their babies eat and drink after 6 months of age. Here's how it went... 

Q: How many months did you wait to start giving them regular food that everyone could eat?

Pam-

A: Not counting eggs & mashed potatoes about 8 or 9 months. But they ate potatoes and eggs much earlier.

Tosha-

A: 8-10 months

Q: What kind of food would you give them?

Pam-

A: Squash, tomatoes, jello, French fries, Green beans were Alayna's favorite food of all and her eggs.

Oh they both ate vienna sausage.

Tosha-

A: Bread, French fries, Cheetos, Popsicles, lemons with sugar, lots of noodles at Chinese restaurants. 

Q: What about drinks? Any juices or soft drinks?

Pam-

A: Yes they both had tea in their bottles, apple juice too. I would put Dr. Pepper in their bottles and shake them to get the fizz out so it wouldn't spew out all over them. 

Tosha-

A: Tea, cow's milk

-This was so fun for me to see what their answers were. It kept me giggling at every response they had! :) I wish I was as brave as these two women to give my baby boy some crazy types of food. But with all the stuff they jam pack into our food these days, I just couldn't do it. 

I hope you enjoyed our first Mommy Monday and found it as fun as we did! You can continue to follow along every Monday night for more posts that will keep all the Mommy's reading!

-By the way, have you given your baby any weird type of food or drinks in their first year? ;) 

Becoming Israel

I had a lot of anxiety about making my blog public at first and going back to facebook, and let me explain why...

•  My family- There's always that pit in your stomach about what people will do with your pictures of your children. I think everyone who has babies can understand this feeling. You want to protect your family first above all else.

•  Privacy- Now days anyone can find out where you live and where you're posting from (supposedly), and you have to admit, that's a really scary thought. Also making your blog public means anyone can pin it on pinterest and link it to other different websites.

•  Being judged- This blog is based around being a Christian family and our everyday struggles to uphold our faith in Christ. I want people to know that I don't think we are perfect because we believe in The Lord, but to be reaching for becoming like Christ, it's inevitable for us to want to try.

With these three points, comes some internal struggles for me in a deeper sense. 

I want Levi to grow up in church, to know Jesus and the stories of the Bible, and all there is to a life built on a Godly foundation. But most of all I want him to KNOW God. To walk beside Him and let The Lord hold his hand through all the days of his life. To let God be there to catch his tears and his breath when he's hurting, because God is real. I know that if my son really comes to know Christ, he will surely know the difference between false teachings and what comes straight out of the Bible in plain sight. God is real and He loves us like I love my son, but way beyond how far my human love can go. This is what I pray for him.

But I also know I will be judged for the way I want to bring up my son. All people judge one another in some way, whether we realize it or not.

In high school I got judged and tormented a lot for going to church and being a Christian, but not because I was the do-gooder type, I was the opposite. I was in church every Sunday and Wednesday but I didn't walk the walk. I wanted so badly to be all in for God but I continually got pulled back by myself. I was my own worst enemy. Do I regret growing up in church? Never. I am so thankful I got to experience being apart of the church and youth group. When I finally defeated my demons that were holding me back, God let me see clearly. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for the church experiences I had what seems like so long ago. 

And yes, I know I will be judged by the people who were around and close to me during my darkest days, but we should try to help them to understand that the part of you who once was lost, is now found. 

My husband and my son are also constant reminders to me that I never want to turn back. And I never will.

I became a Christian and got baptized when I was 8 years old. To me, this was no mistake. I have been living with God beside me ever since then through all my struggles. Don't get me wrong, I have had my doubts about God and I think every Christian has at some point. I have had bad seasons of self destruction, but never enough of all this to ever be swayed away from Him. In my heart I know He is real and that He is with me all the time. It is a supernaturally overwhelming feeling, if you have really accepted Christ into your life, that you feel His presence and you cannot deny that He's here.

With all that being said, this is the reason I decided to hit that public button. To share EVERYTHING. Good and bad. To be honest about my journey with God throughout my life. It's important to me that my story is heard. For encouragement to God's children. This task is much bigger to me than my fear of all my three points. We are rising up and now is the time to share His word, and know that even as a stay-at-home mom, there are still ways to have an impact on someone's life who is in need of seeing God in your hopeful words.

You're probably wondering why the title of this post is called "Becoming Israel." So let me tell you. In Genesis chapter 27 we read about a man named Jacob who has done awful things to his family. The name Jacob in the Bible means "deceiver." After wrestling with God and not giving up until God blessed him, God gives Jacob a new name, Israel. Which means "God prevails." Although Jacob has done some questionable things throughout his life, God still longed to use him as an example to His children. We all have a part of Jacob in us. We've all done things we're not proud of, because we're sinners. But if you let Him, God can save you from yourself.

"But you are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you. (And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them do not belong to Him at all.) And Christ lives within you, so even though your body will die because of sin, the Spirit gives you life because you have been made right with God." -Romans 8:9-10 NLT

Love One Another

This is a topic that I happen to LOVE talking about ;) So I'm just going to dive right into this and tell you that this has been on my heart for quite some time to get this message out. At first I thought about doing several different topics that are in this same category but this one was at the center of them all anyway.

I want to start off with a verse from John chapter 13: "So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples." (Verses 34-35)

If you've read John, you'll know that Jesus was telling his disciples he didn't have very much time left with them on earth and all he requested from them was love. Notice just in these two verses Jesus refers to love four times, and says LOVE EACH OTHER twice. 

 Personally, and this is just me, loving a stranger and showing an act of kindness can sometimes be much easier than loving or caring for the ones closest to you.
Loving your friends and family can sometimes be really hard, with our humanity we tend to get angry and offended A LOT. Especially with the people we see all the time. Emotions can run high. And that's where God should come in and humble our souls. 
"But those who won't care for their relatives, especially those in their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers." -1 Timothy 5:8

We sometimes get caught up in our own lives and providing for the family under our own roof, that we miss out on the opportunity to spend time and care for the rest of our family. Or maybe your situation is completely different, maybe you've tried to reach out and you've gotten nothing because you lead different lives. Whatever your circumstance, NEVER give up. God NEVER gives up on His people. If He did, we would all be dead. The key is to pray for your family, for God to heal your family and help everyone come together and love each other.

And I have to tell you I am one of the biggest prayer warriors, I love praying to God about everything. God loves feeding our faith in Him, He wants to hear our prayers. In the book of Matthew, Jesus says "You can pray for anything, and if you have faith, you will receive it." (Verse 22) 

A few months ago my sister, Tosha, moved closer to where we live so we are now both in the same town and just minutes away from each other. So we decided to start a family game night to try to build our relationship. Her daughter, Kailey, is in the band at her high school and she plays on Friday nights football games. Therefore, we decided that for every away game that Kailey had and would have to travel with the band on the bus, that Tosha, her husband, and her other two younger boys would skip it and come to our house for a domino night. So basically every other Friday night, but since then we've caved and done it on Saturday nights too because we love it so much. Tosha and I are very far apart in age so I didn't get the chance to grow up with her I guess you could say. But I have grown to feel very spiritually attached to her, we have a lot in common and value our faith the same.

Having best friends and other girlfriends is wonderful but there's something about being closely connected to your family that is very satisfying. To know that no matter what, you will always have someone to call when you need anything at all. 

We should never lose sight of our love for everyone, and this doesn't mean just saying, "Of course you know I love you." Show it with your actions.

Love one another always :)

From our family nights! My nephews and baby Levi with his Grandmama!

    

Sweet Sundays

The weekends for us is all about family time, and to fill you in on why we're so devoted to this routine right now is because Matt works from 9am to 7pm, Monday-Friday. So he only gets a few hours with Levi before bedtime during the week. But he's off Saturday and Sunday so we really try to let Levi spend as much time with his Daddy as we can.

However, this weekend has been a dreary and rainy one. Matthew had a wedding rehearsal Friday night and then the wedding to follow Saturday night. Levi and I didn't go because I didn't want to make him sit through a wedding ceremony, he has never sat through anything quietly. Plus the wedding started at 3pm and that's just around his nap time. Matthew said everyone asked about us and where we were, and it kind of makes me feel like I'm obligated for us to go everywhere as a family, but sometimes I wonder if they've forgotten what it's like to have an infant. Maybe they remember and just don't care because they have a bunch of their family there to take turns holding them and shushing them. But it would've been just me, sitting in the pew, with a crying squirming baby, making everyone stare at us like we're aliens. It just didn't seem like the realistic thing to do. Maybe that's just me. On the upside, we had planned for Matthew to skip the reception so he could come home and get some time in with me and Levi. Also Matthew always complains that he never likes going by himself and being alone at big functions like that, plus he really wanted to watch the A&M game.

But today Matthew woke up sick and had to stay in bed most of the day, so that put another little dent in our schedule. And I usually send Matthew to the supermarket on Sundays to do the weekly grocery shopping because he gets it done a lot faster than I do. Probably because I'm like a squirrel in places like that, I love to look at everything and also because I'll end up spending more money than I should. Needless to say, I had to go today. So when I left the house I was in a hurry because I also had to get Matthews tux he rented from the night before back to the store on time, and I barely made it because I forgot everything closes early on Sundays. But when I had left the house I forgot to check my phone to see how much charge it had because I told Matthew to send me a text of what all he needed at the store. So after dropping off the tux, I got to the supermarket and of course my phone was dead. I started to freak out at first and thought I'd have to wing it and get what I thought he might want, but then it came to my blonde mind (while I was still sitting in the car, thankfully) that they sold car chargers inside, duh. Of course I ran in as fast as I could and bought one real quick, then ran back out to plug it in so I could memorize his text of what all he wanted. But being the supermom that I am (not), I got it all done and was back home in time to feed the baby dinner.

While we were watching the A&M game Saturday night

And I have to say I've loved the rain we've been getting these past few days. I just love rain in general. However, we are currently under a tornado watch as I'm typing this, so I'm about to jump out of my skin and probably won't be able to sleep at all tonight.

In spite of everything being on the crazy side this weekend, I still love everything about Sundays. Especially spending time with my Savior. In the midst of trying to get everything accomplished today, on my way to the grocery store I heard the song "Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)" by Hillsong United come on the Christian station, and it was so beautiful to me in that moment that I literally started to cry. It was like my God was trying to tell me to slow down and just be thankful and worship. And I did.

I am so grateful that having a relationship with God is so beautiful and filled with so much grace and love. It is beyond anything like a relationship here on earth. If you haven't already, I encourage you to read Revelation 4 and 5 so you can picture coming into His presence and spending time with Him.

"So I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise my soul will rest in your embrace 

For I am yours and you are mine"

-Oceans by Hillsong United 

Childlike Hearts

My Dad was recently hospitalized for a kidney infection and cellulitis two weeks ago. During his hospital stay he somehow had too much fluid intake and ended up with heart failure due to the fluid building up in his lungs. Which resulted in being sedated and put on temporary life support. He's had two surgeries to remove aneurysms just this year, and has had several heart attacks and heart surgeries throughout his life. Suffice it to say, I am beyond thankful to the Lord that my Dad made it through the life support for those few days (which seemed like a lifetime) and woke up like it had never happened.  

I can't quite explain to you the feelings and emotions I had seeing him like that. It was the hardest thing for me to get through, not knowing if he would ever wake up and if he did wake up, would he be the same? In my mind now it seems like I was being dramatic in a way because he is back to being himself, and somehow it makes me feel childish that I thought he would never wake up. 

However thinking about it now, if you would have walked into my Dad's hospital room and saw all of his children standing there, that's exactly what you would've seen, children. Somewhere in our minds, we all reverted back to being little kids hoping and praying that our Daddy would pull through so we could hug and kiss him and tell him how much we love him. And only by God's hands that heal, we got to be those kids and see our Dad wake up and feel alive.

Coincidentally a few weeks before this all happened, I got a call from my Dad that we were going to have a family gathering at his house. I am very grateful that we got to pull through with this family event, due to the fact that we had no idea what was going to happen in the future. And we never do, and I think God knew these moments and pictures were necessary for my Dad to come out a fighter during his time in the hospital.

We love you Dad :)

(Missing two of my sisters)

 "Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying." -Romans 12:12

A Bit Of Our Summer Fun

Just wanted to let you in on a few of the trips we made this summer to some of our favorite places. Having an infant doesn't always mean he will enjoy everything you do just yet, but we loved taking him out with us!

 Zoo Adventures :)

 Matthew has an obsession with aquariums, and it's definitely growing on Levi. Matthew insisted on making his nursery aquarium themed so he has fish stickers all over his walls, and I have to say Levi LOVES it! Daddy & son bonding :)

 Museum Exhibits!

 He enjoyed looking at all the enormous creepy fossils!

Matthew & I are kids at heart and we love to go exploring together, so this was definitely a great experience for us to have Levi along for the ride this summer. I bet when he's a little older Matthew will probably enjoy taking him places rather than taking me. Let's hope they still let Mommy tag along with them in the near future!

Daily Dose of Levi

He is getting too big! I love this last picture because it looks like he's saying, "YEA!!" 

 He is in the stage right now where he thinks everything is his to grab, and wants to help you hold and carry everything. His favorite thing to do though, is eat. He is not a picky baby, you put it in front of him and he wants it. He eats every kind of vegetable baby food, unlike his Daddy, Matthew won't eat anything green. Except a salad on occasion. Levi really loves all baby food, I'm so blessed for that. The first time he tried green beans though, he did throw up, but after that it was game on for all things green. Which makes Mommy very happy. 

We use Sprout organic baby food, by the way. When I don't have time to process my own, that's my go to. It has no added sugars, gmo's, and their packaging is BPA free. BUT I always buy organic real bananas at the supermarket separate because they go bad the easiest in baby food, and I never want to chance it!

A Testimony of God's Grace

This is a small portion of my testimony and real events and issues that I dealt with in my life just last year, accompanied by my own pictures. So right now I am inviting you to take this journey with me and let me explain why I am who I am today. I feel led to really dig deep into my story for those who will stumble upon my blog, and know that there is hope in the Lord.

I recently came upon a piece in the book I'm currently reading about Christian marriages, and it has a lot to do with where I'm headed with this post. So lets start off with this so you can get the gist of the whole post-
 "The Bible begins with a Being so powerful that His words command the non-existent things to exist, and they obey. It presents to us a Being so holy and just that he once drowned every person on earth, sparing only the eight people who still looked to Him. This book is full of examples of God punishing the arrogant and blessing the humble. And the Bible concludes with visions of a terrifying future judgement, where every person is cast eternally into either a place of perfect pleasure in union with God or a place of ultimate pain apart from Him." -You and Me Forever by Francis Chan & Lisa Chan

I want to start by saying I don't think it honors God by getting into past mistakes, but just so you know, I have had my share of really REALLY big ones. My friends and family can account for that. With that being said, I knew in my heart God was going to punish me somehow, because we all have to face the consequences of our mistakes no matter how big or small. Some may call it karma, but I call it God. Every mistake you could make as a teenager, I probably made it. The sad part is, I'm serious. But I was still a teenager and didn't really care about my conscience. I attended church and was actually a big part of the church but that impact only went so far for me. There was really something wrong inside me. I had my own demons. Don't get me wrong, I believed in the Lord but I wasn't willing to walk the walk in that time.

When I hit the stage in my life where all the bad things I had done came flooding to me, like I had just become a whole different person and I was on the outside looking in, was when I fell in love with Matthew. I knew I loved him and wanted to have a family with this beyond wonderful man, but how in the world could this man love someone like me? His approach was Godly to me, he didn't care what bad things I had done and he was accepting. I knew then I wanted to marry him and I wanted to change those parts of my personality that were tainted. 

Those parts are long gone now, but I still ache when I think about the horrible things I did. I can't believe it was me. 

But my punishments came like a raging fire. When I got pregnant with Levi, I experienced the most excruciating pains I have ever felt in my life. We ended up at the ER and they did an ultrasound and Levi was okay but I had 50 tiny pebble size gallstones itching to escape from my gallbladder. I had to live with these pains for 5 months of my pregnancy. I was living on cereal and sandwiches, and had high blood pressure. That wasn't the end for me though, it was far from over. At 35 weeks I started to get stretchmarks, which wasn't so bad, but came as a surprise. But something came riding along with the stretchmarks, a rare rash that only 1% of pregnant women get inside your stretchmarks. The Puppps rash. I fought with the rash for 2 weeks, with no sleep, and I was days away from losing my sanity. I lived in the bathtub. And poor Matthew was days away from losing his as well. He was such a trooper and my angel through everything but it took a huge toll on him to watch me suffer while carrying our child. At 37 weeks they had no choice but to induce because of high blood pressure and to tell you the truth I don't remember much about my labor and delivery, only that I was suffering from exhaustion and couldn't stop shaking for some reason. 

There is something specific and very important you should know though. The night we went to the hospital to have Levi, before I felt I needed to go, I was in the bathtub crying my eyes out to God asking him to please make it stop, make everything stop. And he did, that same night.

We should have a healthy fear of God. He brings consequences, but He also brings mercy, grace and love. I am a true believer because God fed my faith that night and in the midst of everything I dealt with, I never turned my back on Him. I prayed to Him to heal me, to take the pain away. I was never angry with God, I knew I had to face my punishment, but I also knew only God could be the one to let it end.

Someone once told me that the people who know the story of how Jesus died on the cross for our sins and still choose not to believe, or maybe once did believe but then had a change of heart, hell on earth will be more excruciating for them when the time comes. I'm not going to say I know for sure this is in the Bible but it is powerful and convicting words. 

My relationship with God has grown immensely and I don't like to look back on the seasons of my life that were very dark for me. But I love to tell my story because it's definitely a faith feeder. God loves to continue to feed my faith in little ways every day, and I love that part of our relationship. He really wants me to know He's here with me all the time and to always trust Him with everything.

And let's not forget out of all of this pain came the most precious angel I have ever laid my eyes on -

 My Levi :)

 "Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world..." -Philippians 2:14-15

I hope my testimony inspired or encouraged your faith in Christ!

Honestly...

I'm finding some time to tell you about why we decided to start using Honest Company products, while I'm nursing my baby, so bear with me if there's some grammar mistakes (for all the grammar nazis). My baby boy, Levi, is currently a red head and very fair skinned. His skin is very sensitive like mine, but I'm guessing since his body is still maturing it's extra fragile. I started out using pampers wipes and diapers, the diapers I still use because I have had no problems with them. The wipes on the other hand are the "natural" kind, this seems to be an overstatement. Don't get me wrong, I am not one of those overbearing chemical free moms, everything has chemicals in it these days. I just want what makes my baby, and our family, heal faster and nourish our bodies. With that said here's the story -

When I started Levi on solid foods I also used the pampers natural wipes on his face and hands to clean off the stickiness. He immediately had a reaction to the wipes and started getting really red and tiny red bumps started to appear on his chin and cheeks. His wrists were also turning red. So I was wondering why this doesn't happen to his bottom area after a diaper change ? Well weeks later he had a dirty diaper and I went to change it and I guess I wiped too hard or too much but he had the same redness and bumps pop up after that diaper. Now I know you're probably thinking it was diaper rash or something else of that kind, but let me inform you, I am a little on the crazy side about changing my baby's diapers. He has NEVER had diaper rash or anything on his bottom in the whole 8 months of his life. I've made sure of that. It's one of my biggest fears with my baby, I have no idea why. I will break down in tears if I see anything strange in his diaper area. Maybe it's a new mom thing. So I was freaking out and even made a call to our pediatric nurse.

A while back I had ordered the discovery free trial kit from the Honest Company and I remembered it came with healing balm which is safe for babies. I personally already loved the healing balm because I used it on my hands when they would start to crack and dry out from me washing them too much, another new mom thing I suppose. I was hesitant because it had some iffy ingredients in it like beeswax, sunflower and coconut oils, and I was afraid he would have another reaction to that as well. But I sucked it up and rubbed it on him, praying it would work. Lo and behold by the next diaper change the bumps were smaller. The nurse told me herself that diaper rash or yeast infections would not heal that fast, so it must have been an allergic reaction. 

Thankfully Target has started carrying  Honest products and the healing balm is one of those along with their cloth wipes I use for his hands and face. I also really love their hand soaps, they don't dry out your skin like all the rest. 

So props to Jessica Alba! You have one very happy customer with an appreciative and notable review!

Little bit of Levi

How I wish my precious baby could slow down on the whole "getting bigger" frenzy. Here are a few pictures to catch you up on our first year with this angel -

Easter Sunday 2014 with Daddy (3 months old)

(6 months)

Baby Levi now (8 months)

Fixing to start crawling! Let the baby proofing begin!

We are all proud co sleepers by the way. There were a lot of people who advised me against this sleeping habit. But now when I think back about what their facial expressions were when they were explaining to me why I shouldn't go this route, I remember they were all smiling. Which leads me to believe they were all in this predicament, and if they are anything like me, loved that their babies longed to be close to them. I personally wouldn't have it any other way. That's just me though :)

- VV :)

A Godly Home

I posted this on instagram a while back and I wanted to share it with all of you as well. These lines are from the movie "God's NOT Dead", they are very powerful to me not only for Christians but for those who are non believers as well - 

Mark: You prayed and believed your whole life. Never done anything wrong. And here you are. You're the nicest person I know. I am the meanest. You have dementia. My life is perfect. Explain that to me!

Mark's Mother: Sometimes the devil allows people to live a life free of trouble because he doesn't want them turning to God. Their sin is like a jail cell, except it is all nice and comfy and there doesn't seem to be any reason to leave. The door's wide open. Till one day, time runs out, and the cell door slams shut, and suddenly it's too late. 

This was probably my favorite part of the movie because there is so much conviction in these words. 
I have always wondered why so many people who are not Christians live such a perfect life (most of the time anyway). I always thought to myself, "They must secretly really love God, otherwise why would he be blessing them with zero problems?" And I'm over here struggling for air. When I heard her say this though, it finally clicked for me. When you're off on one of your seasons where you've given up all hope, the devil is there cheering you on, putting things in front of you and making you happy but "sinfully" happy. God loves to test the waters, make you a stronger Christian but most of all, he wants ALL of our trust in Him. He wants us to pray to Him and ask Him to humble our souls, not continue to fall into a Vegas type happy land of money and pleasure. That is all fun and games but in the end you are broke financially and emotionally.

The Bible says, "But if you pray to God and seek the favor of the Almighty, and if you are pure and live with integrity, he will surely rise up and restore your happy home. And though you started with little, you will end with much." - Job 8:5-7